Strawberry Frosted Donut Oreo

 

Product circa: 2021

Vanilla cookie with 2 types of creme: strawberry (with sprinkles) and… I can’t figure out what the 2nd one is.  I’ve deconstructed the cookies and tasted the odd, beige creme on its own.  It might be different from the original Oreo creme, but only barely.  Moreover, I can’t figure out what it’s supposed to be or represent.

Despite how ridiculous Oreo varieties can get, they almost always are in balance; this variety is not.  This is the most punishingly sweet Oreo I’ve ever tasted… it’s either worse than the Double Stuf or Triple Stuff ones.

Hi-C Ecto Cooler (2017)

 

Product circa: 2017 and intermittently after

Back in the day, Ecto Cooler was one of the coolest things you could have in your school lunchbox… before Capri Sun gained popularity, that is.  I gotta hand it to Coca-Cola for bringing it back for a time, and I'm glad to hear they've done it again since.  Luckily for folks my age, companies are realizing that there is a huge amount of money in fanservice to nostalgia of products like these.

This formula tastes exactly like it did in the 80s/90s, and I have no idea how they do it.  It’s an orange flavored drink unlike anything else that’s been made.  It’s not pure orange juice, it’s clearly mixed with some kind of artificial drink, but it still maintains an acidic bite that a bottled juice drink wouldn’t have.  I think I’m going to start mixing Hi-C Orange and orange juice to see if I can replicate this.

Dum Dums with Hawaiian Punch flavors

 

Product circa: 2023

A nice little cross-branding venture between two legendary brands.

While these are from 2023, there is evidence online of Hawaiian Punch joints going back as far as 2014.

Unfortunately, these things don’t hit quite like they used to when we were kids.  They are absent of any tang or interest; they are high on sugar, low on flavor.  The Polar Blast flavor is a simple blue raspberry that tastes lifeless.  The Fruit Juicy Red flavor is definitely on par with the drink flavor, but its vigor just doesn’t translate into hard candy.

Goldfish Old Bay

 

Product circa: 2022 and intermittently after

I wouldn’t have expected Old Bay to go so well with cheese crackers, but it does.  The seasoning is bold, with black pepper, onion, paprika, and celery seed singing loudly.  It would be a tragedy if they didn’t make these a permanent product.

Shoutout to my DC-area snack racketeers for getting me this.

Lay's Cheddar Jalapeno

 

Product circa: 2020 (and later?)

Note: This is a Presumptive Ephemeral Nom

Evidently this product was a joint with John Legend?

I gotta be honest, I think most Lays varieties with cheese fall flat.  This one is no different.  You’ve got your normal cheese seasoning, and this has some added heat, along with a vaguely vegetal flavor that I’ve tasted before as trying to simulate jalapeno.  But when you squint your eyes, it’s just cheese potato chips, and forgettable.

Reese's Jumbo Cup

 

Product circa: 2025

Note: This is a Presumptive Ephemeral Nom

At about 3 inches across, this thing shows that Reese's are really running out of form factor variations for their product.  But you always gotta try the new Reese's shapes/sizes, because they can affect the experience of the snack itself.

This is just like the regular Reese's Cup blown up in size.  The chocolate is thicker, but so is the peanut butter filling.  I daresay the chocolate is too a touch too thick, but I wouldn't be surprised if it were necessary, structurally.  In the end, this doesn't hold a candle to the original Reese's Cup, which is already almost perfect.

Frute Brute cereal

 

Product circa: 2022 (and many years before and still to come)

Part of the Count Chocula entourage that makes its appearance seasonally.  This is the first time I had heard of Frute Brute, despite it existing, in various forms, since 1974.

Ever had cherry cereal?  I bet you haven’t.  These seem to be cherry flavored paws with the occasional marshmallow to provide most of the sweetness.  The cherry flavoring really works well here, it’s quite a novel and pleasant experience.  If I ate cereal on the reg, and if this stuff were available on the reg, I would definitely make a habit of buying it.