Red Bull Summer Edition 2019

 

Product circa: summer 2019

For several years now Red Bull has issued summer editions of their product, and each year it's a different flavor.  This is totally in character at this point, because Red Bull now has well over a dozen variations of their original energy drink on the shelves, almost to a saturation point.

I don't often drink Red Bull products, but when I do, I regret it.  It's hard to say exactly what they were aiming for with this drink.

As the soda hits the tongue, the experience seems normal.  But after that, it's all downhill.  The short of it is that the main flavors of this drink seem to be a sort of floral coconut which, on paper, sound great to me.  But these two combine with the medicinal bubblegum taste of the original Red Bull to a result that tastes completely like sunscreen lotion.

That's the whole of it.  I feel like I'm drinking something that's not food.  Most Red Bull variations don't hew to the original's flavor, but in this case when it does, it's disastrous.  However, I'm going to give it 1 NOM, because I can somehow see that some folks might like this.


Red Bull Summer Edition 2019:- Passable
Original Red Bull (for comparison):- Passable

Sprite LeBron's Mix

Product circa: summer 2015

LeBron's Mix was actually a reprise of Sprite's "6 Mix by LeBron James" which had appeared a year before.  Both had the same formula: a Sprite base with cherry and orange mixed in.  The promotion seemed to be nothing more than Coca-Cola attempting to cash in on LeBron's immense popularity from the early 2010s.  I presume that LeBron himself collaborated on how his mix would taste, but I'm not sure.

Sprite variations, which are seldom, tend to be quite good, but this one falls short.  The first half of each sip is nice, with a cherry-like Sprite vibe, but the aftertaste is like cheap orange candy.  Each swig plays with your emotions, such that it ends up being worse than the original product.

So unfortunately, the flavored Sprite exceptionalism ended in 2015.


Sprite LeBron's Mix:- Passable
Original Sprite (for comparison):- Good

Oreo the Most Stuf

Product circa: winter 2019

In my review of Mega Stuf Oreos, I declared that satire was dead.  As of today, god is dead.

As Mega Stuf was more or less 3x creme as compared to the original, this is at least 4x.

The blurry line of earnestness and kitsch has been crossed.  Oreo knows exactly what it's doing, and this is an exercise in self-aware deprecation.  This is art.  This is a collector's item, a celebration of pomp.  Because it certainly isn't food.


Oreo the Most Stuf:- Passable
Original Oreo(for comparison):- Great

Red Bull Summer Edition (2017)

Product circa: summer 2017

In addition to the rainbow-ification that Red Bull has seen over the past year or two with all its new colored versions, Red Bull has also been issuing Summer Editions of their beverage for several years now.  I'm not sure if the flavor is always different for each summer, but it was for this vintage.

Red Bull went with grapefruit in 2017, one of my favorite flavors, bar none.  Grapefruit can be fairly polarizing, however, and they didn't pull any punches here.

Despite the fact that this product uses sucrose as a sweetener, it's short-lived on the tongue.  You'll get the sweetness first, and then it disappears, never to return.  Sourness pushes back against the sugar, making you forget it.  The flavor, however, is great; it's like biting into a fresh grapefruit.  It is at this point that the caffeine-driven bitterness makes itself known, and it's considerable, though not inappropriate for a grapefruit product.  Finally, the sourness kicks back in and lingers endlessly on the aftertaste.

This could be called refreshing if it weren't a bitter, caffeine-dense energy drink.  It's a great attempt, but I think a little more sugar would bump it up to 3 NOMs.


Red Bull Summer Edition 2017:- Good
Original Red Bull (for comparison):-Passable

Cheetos Crunchy Flamin' Hot Chipotle Ranch

Note: This is a Presumptive Ephemeral Nom.

Product circa: 2017

I'm pleased to see that Cheetos is releasing some new products.  This one was quite unexpected.

Despite this snack having many different flavors, the first bite immediately starts with cheese, which is a nice surprise.  After that, you're immediately reminded that this is a "Flamin' Hot" Cheetos product, as the sharp acidic chile powder takes over.  However, the slight chipotle smokiness and a garlicky creamy ranch temper the chile and make it so much better.  I ate this whole bag in quick order, which doesn't happen often.

Cheetos Crunchy Flamin' Hot Chipotle Ranch:- Outstanding
Original Cheetos Crunchy (for comparison): - Great