Oreo the Most Stuf

Product circa: winter 2019

In my review of Mega Stuf Oreos, I declared that satire was dead.  As of today, god is dead.

As Mega Stuf was more or less 3x creme as compared to the original, this is at least 4x.

The blurry line of earnestness and kitsch has been crossed.  Oreo knows exactly what it's doing, and this is an exercise in self-aware deprecation.  This is art.  This is a collector's item, a celebration of pomp.  Because it certainly isn't food.


Oreo the Most Stuf:- Passable
Original Oreo(for comparison):- Great

Red Bull Summer Edition (2017)

Product circa: summer 2017

In addition to the rainbow-ification that Red Bull has seen over the past year or two with all its new colored versions, Red Bull has also been issuing Summer Editions of their beverage for several years now.  I'm not sure if the flavor is always different for each summer, but it was for this vintage.

Red Bull went with grapefruit in 2017, one of my favorite flavors, bar none.  Grapefruit can be fairly polarizing, however, and they didn't pull any punches here.

Despite the fact that this product uses sucrose as a sweetener, it's short-lived on the tongue.  You'll get the sweetness first, and then it disappears, never to return.  Sourness pushes back against the sugar, making you forget it.  The flavor, however, is great; it's like biting into a fresh grapefruit.  It is at this point that the caffeine-driven bitterness makes itself known, and it's considerable, though not inappropriate for a grapefruit product.  Finally, the sourness kicks back in and lingers endlessly on the aftertaste.

This could be called refreshing if it weren't a bitter, caffeine-dense energy drink.  It's a great attempt, but I think a little more sugar would bump it up to 3 NOMs.


Red Bull Summer Edition 2017:- Good
Original Red Bull (for comparison):-Passable

Cheetos Crunchy Flamin' Hot Chipotle Ranch

Note: This is a Presumptive Ephemeral Nom.

Product circa: 2017

I'm pleased to see that Cheetos is releasing some new products.  This one was quite unexpected.

Despite this snack having many different flavors, the first bite immediately starts with cheese, which is a nice surprise.  After that, you're immediately reminded that this is a "Flamin' Hot" Cheetos product, as the sharp acidic chile powder takes over.  However, the slight chipotle smokiness and a garlicky creamy ranch temper the chile and make it so much better.  I ate this whole bag in quick order, which doesn't happen often.

Cheetos Crunchy Flamin' Hot Chipotle Ranch:- Outstanding
Original Cheetos Crunchy (for comparison): - Great

Pop-Tarts Splitz

Product circa: autumn 2018

Surely Pop-Tarts has better ideas than simply mashing products together, right?  Maybe not.

These pastries are bifurcated into two different flavors on each half of the pastry.  Each side is also frosted differently.

The sugar cookie side: Not bad.  It has a doughy, buttery, cake batter vibe.  It tastes like the (obnoxiously named) Printed Fun Pop-Tarts Frosted Sugar Cookie, but not as good.

The brownie batter side: Good, but it doesn't have the "batter" taste, like the other side does (even though the other side really shouldn't).  It's a tasty chocolate Pop-Tart, but it's forgettable.

Each side eaten together: nothing special, certainly not greater than the sum of the parts.

Before we close, I need to share the absolutely hilarious comic panel from the back of this product's box:

Pop-Tarts Splitz:- Good
Original Pop-Tarts S'mores(for comparison):- Great 

Snickers Espresso, Sweet & Salty, and Fiery

Product circa: summer 2018

Glad to see Snickers getting into the "ephemeral trio" game!  They've been known to issue limited varieties before, but it's been a while.

Espresso: This is the most subtle of the three.  You can't actually taste the coffee, but whatever coffee flavoring that they do add to this product changes the flavor of the chocolate itself.  This is very nice, and a slightly different experience than the original product.  This goes to show why many different kinds of chocolate dessert recipes call for instant coffee as a flavor enhancer.

Sweet & Salty: I'm not sure what I expected here, but I liked this more that I thought I would.  On first bite you'll notice more salt than usual, which is confirmed on the product's sodium count on the label.  I guess I thought this product would simply contain more sodium, but in fact it has crunchy bits of salted toffee throughout.  It's quite pleasant.  If you're into salted caramel, you'll love this.

Fiery: The first bite or two will taste identical to the original product.  A few bites in, you'll notice a dull burn in your throat.  A few bites after that, you'll actually start to taste that chile was added to the flavor of this product.  It's really well executed.  This is probably the best spicy candy that I've ever tasted.

Overall, while none of these break the 3-NOM barrier, this trio is a great lesson in how to do balanced and nuanced variations of a classic.

Snickers Espresso:- Good

Snickers Sweet & Salty:- Good

Snickers Fiery:- Good

Original Snickers(for comparison):- Good

Lay's Fiery Habanero

Product circa: August 2018

Well this was a pleasant surprise to see in the store!  Especially as I've been honing my own Jamaican Jerk recipe this summer.

Anyway, the punch line is that these are disappointing.

While a decent heat builds after a few chips, the flavor is mostly uninteresting.  The distinct flavor of scotch bonnet is not present, and instead it seems to be a fairly generic blend of chile and spices/aromatics.  There's even a strange sweet barbecue flavor.  These chips are so non-distinct that the bag could have had a dozen different flavor names on it and it would have been passable.

Speaking of "passable", this product will be rated 1 NOM.  They're easily 2 NOMs in terms of flavor, but the execution of its namesake's flavor is too lazy.

Lay's Fiery Habanero:- Passable
Original Lay's (for comparison):- Good

Ephemeral Crunchy M&M's

Products circa: summer 2018

M&M's have issued a poll product for no apparent reason.  Maybe they're trying to mimic some success had by Lay's as of recent?

These three flavors are new varieties of M&M's Crunchy version.  The rice-krispy part of these candies make them very pleasant and really easy to eat more and more.  Each flavor also comes with a corresponding change in the colors of the candy shells.  Fun!

The first is Crunchy Mint.  Nothing special here.  It's a refreshing peppermint flavor that you'd expect from any other mint-chocolate candy.  There's a cooling menthol in here as well, not unlike Junior Mint candies.

The second is Crunchy Raspberry.  The flavor here is actually quite good.  The raspberry is natural-tasting, and almost juicy.

The third is Crunchy Espresso.  Very nice.  The flavor is like instant coffee, and not in a bad way.  It could have been made a bit stronger though.

Overall, a very decent showing.

M&M's Crunchy Mint:- Good
M&M's Crunchy Raspberry:- Good
M&M's Crunch Espresso:- Good
Original M&M's Crunch(for comparison):- Good